5 Things You Really Shouldn't Do On Substack

From experience

Alright, so you've jumped on the Substack bandwagon.

Congrats!

Welcome to the club of aspiring writers, thinkers, and "I-swear-I'm-not-procrastinating-I'm-building-my-brand" enthusiasts.

Before you go wild with that publish button, let me share five things you should avoid on Substack.

Or don't.

Who am I to tell you what to do.

1. Turn Your Newsletter into a Therapy Session

Look, we all have issues. I know.

But your Substack isn't the place to work through that every time. Unless that's precisely what people signed up for.

I wish.

Your readers signed up for cold hard facts, tips and tricks, witty commentary, or help with online stuff, not a front-row seat to your personal meltdowns.

Save the soul-searching for your journal or your actual therapist.

2. Become the Spam Lord of Newsletters

You know that friend who texts you 47 times in a row because you didn't respond to their "you up?" message at 2 AM?

Don't be the Substack version of that friend.

Yes, consistency is key, but there's a fine line between "dedicated writer" and "restraining order candidate."

People have lives outside of refreshing their inbox every 5 minutes... I hear.

3. Pick Fights in the Comments Like It's Your Job

The comments section: where rational discourse goes to die.

As the author, you might think it's your duty to defend your honor against every keyboard warrior who dares disagree with you.

It's not.

Engaging in a caps-lock battle with "DefinitelyNotATroll123" over the merits of pineapple on pizza (it's delicious, fight me) is not the hill you want to die on.

Take the high road.

Or, if you must, address their comments passive-aggressively in your next post like a true professional.

4. Clickbait Your Way to the Bottom

You're not a sketchy website trying to get people to click on ads for miracle weight loss pills.

Don't write headlines like one. "You'll NEVER believe what happened when I breathed oxygen!" is not the way to build a loyal readership.

Unless your next line is "I survived," in which case, carry on.

Clickbait is great until it's not.

5. Treat Your Readers Like They Have the Attention Span of a Goldfish

Just because TikTok has convinced the world that content should be shorter than the time it takes to microwave a burrito doesn't mean your Substack should follow suit.

Your readers are here for substance. Well, most of them are, I assume.

Don't insult their intelligence with posts that could fit in a tweet.

Give them something to chew on. Just, you know, make sure it's digestible. No one wants to read your unedited 50,000-word manifesto.

But a tweet can stay a tweet. Or a Substack Note now. Even better.

The Bottom Line

Substack is a great chance to get your word out. It's a great place to grow your audience.

Write like you give a damn, because somewhere out there, someone does.

I know, it's wild.