The 10 Unwritten Rules of Social Media
That We All Pretend to Follow
Ah, social media—where influencers, meme lords, and your aunt Karen all coexist in chaotic harmony.
There is no official rulebook, but we all know what we should and shouldn’t do, right? Or do we?
Let's break down these 10 unwritten rules of social media, how people actually follow them, and whether they “work”.
1. Thou Shalt Not Overshare... But Also, Overshare Just Enough
The Unwritten Rule:
Post too often, and you’ll be labeled annoying. Post too little, and people will think you’re irrelevant.
What Actually Happens:
People absolutely ignore this rule.
Some people post every waking moment like they’re live-streaming their life. Others disappear for months and suddenly reappear with a long-winded post about their "much-needed break from social media."
Does It Work?
Only if you’re famous. Otherwise, nobody noticed you were gone. Obviously.
2. Like Thy Friend’s Content
The Unwritten Rule:
Every friend’s post deserves a mandatory like, no exceptions.
What Actually Happens:
Some people go full documentary mode with baby photos, collages, and emotional rants. You just can’t like everything. Don’t be a b*tch, and call it a day.
Does It Work?
Not really. Liking a post takes half a second and prevents unnecessary drama. Just do it. 😜
3. Thou Shalt Not Be Cringe, Unless It’s Ironic
The Unwritten Rule:
Posting anything remotely embarrassing is a social crime.
What Actually Happens:
People love cringe content—as long as it’s either unintentional or played off as a joke. Bonus points if it’s an old photo captioned "Who let me post this?!"
Does It Work?
Yes, because nostalgia and self-roasting are engagement goldmines.
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4. A Birthday Tribute Must Be Grand, Or Not Exist At All
The Unwritten Rule:
A proper birthday tribute requires a high-quality photo, a heartfelt message, and at least one embarrassing throwback.
What Actually Happens:
Some people go all out with emotional paragraphs. Others slap a blurry nightclub photo with "HBD!" and call it a day.
Does It Work?
Only if your friend is petty enough to rank birthday posts. Otherwise, a simple text works just fine, I hear.
5. Ignore DMs At Your Own Peril
The Unwritten Rule:
Leaving someone on "seen" is basically ghosting.
What Actually Happens:
Some people reply within seconds (clingy). Others wait six days and then pretend they “just saw this.” Sure.
Does It Work?
No. There is a correct response time, scientifically proven. Or just reply when you remember and blame it on notifications.
6. Inspirational Quotes Are Required Once a Month
The Unwritten Rule:
If you don’t post a deep, motivational quote, are you even growing as a person?
What Actually Happens:
People post things like "Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” —John Lennon" while aggressively checking their like count.
Does It Work?
Let me answer that with a quote:
“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” —Confucius
7. The "Casual Flex" Must Look Unintentional
The Unwritten Rule:
If you’re successful, you must pretend it was completely accidental.
What Actually Happens:
People humblebrag with captions like "Didn’t expect to end up here today!" (posts photo on a yacht).
Does It Work?
Yes. The key is to act clueless about your own success—even if you planned the post six months in advance.
8. Aesthetic Food Pics Are A Basic Human Right
The Unwritten Rule:
If your meal isn’t posted, did you even eat it?
What Actually Happens:
People will rearrange entire tables, adjust the lighting, and let food go cold just to get the perfect shot.
Does It Work?
Yes, even if your food only looks good to a small subset of people. A sad, unseasoned chicken breast will look mouth-watering and delicious to those bodybuilder friends.
9. Thou Shalt Always Pretend to Have Read the Article Before Commenting
The Unwritten Rule:
If you comment on an article or post, you must have actually read it first.
What Actually Happens:
Most people just skim the headline and go straight to the comment section to start trolling. Isn’t that basically the purpose of social media?
Does It Work?
No, but it’s hilarious. Just be careful—you might end up passionately debating an opinion that wasn’t even in the article. (Never happened to me…)
10. Pet Photos Are Exempt From All Rules
The Unwritten Rule:
Too many selfies? Annoying. Too many food pics? Boring. Too many pet photos? Impossible.
What Actually Happens:
No one cares if you post 17 pictures of your cat in the same position. We will like every single one.
Does It Work?
Absolutely. Pets = Internet currency.